Harry Potter Idol
by Kiwi-San
Summary: Harry Potter and American Idol, I don’t think there are enough words to describe the funnyness of that image. rated T because of some language use...hey we're all 16...so yeah
1. Round One of the Semi Finals

**Disclaimer: I DO NOT OWN THE HARRY POTTER CAST, THE WHOLE "AMERICAN IDOL" I DEA, AND THE LYRICS! **

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Me: Hello and welcome to the first Harry Potter Idol! (**audience applauds**) Thank you! Thank you! I am you host and one of your judges, Kiwi-san! With me on the judges panel is Alex and Scott! (**They stand up and waved to the audience)** (**audience applauds again**) Well, how about we get this party started? (**does a little dance, audience claps) (gets off the stage and sites in the middle Scott and Alex)**

Harry: (**walks out to the middle of the stage**) (**Harry Potter FanGirls scream**) (**blushes**) Um…hi…I'm Harry Potter. (**Fans scream again**) I'll be singing "Boulevard of Broken Dreams" by Green Day.

Judges: (**nods and the music starts to play**)

Harry: (**conjures a microphone**) I walk a lonely road, the only one that I have even known. Don't know where it foes, but it's home to me and I walk alone. I walk this empty street on the Boulevard of Broken Dreams. Where the city sleeps and I'm the only one and I walk alone. I walk alone. I walk alone. I walk alone. I walk alone. My shadows the only one that walks beside me. My shallow heart's the only thing that's beating.

FanGirls: WE LOVE YOU HARRY! (**screams and audience claps**)

Me: (**waits for the audience to stop clapping)** Very good. Interesting song. (**Smiles**)

Alex: Gods can those girls ever just SHUT UP? **(throws a glare at a snickering Kiwi, then looks back at Harry.) **Why do I get stuck with the weird ones? **(bangs head against table)** Okay. That's what you are, okay, BUT WHO THE HECK INVITED THOSE FAN GIRLS? **(sigh) (remains quiet)**

Me: **(pats Alex on the back)**

Scott: It was pretty...pretty pathetic...How do you expect to show your face at Hogwarts signing a song like that!(looks to Kiwi) Who ever is next better be good!(Turns to Fangirls) And you...SHUT UP!(Turns back to front stage) 

Harry: **(walks off stage and passes Ron)**

Ron: **(walks out to the middle of the stage and smiles. FanGirls scream) **Hello…I'm Ron Weasley and I will be singing "I'm Too Sexy".

Me: **(is wide-eyed) **Oh Lord **(music starts to play)**

Ron: I'm too sexy for my shirt, so sexy it hurts.

Random Ron Weasley FanGirl: TAKE IT OFF!

Ron: **(turns around)** So I'll shake my little tush- **(music comes to a screeching halt)**

Me: Oh please! For all that is holy, please stop!

Alex: **(bursts out laughing) **y'know, Ron, was it? I don't think I've ever seen something so scary, but then again, in your case it was quite amusing **(shrugs) **Though I think Kiwi's eyes are paralyzed for life.

Me:** (nods)**

Scott: (Looking in awe) What...the...F#$! I mean how do YOU expect anyone to look at you like a good boy! I'm surprised your mother isn't up here saying 'Imma Slap you'!(shakes head) It was better than Harry's. Who's Next?

Hermione: **(nervously walks onstage)** H-Hi. I'm Hermione Granger and I…uh…

Draco: **(yells from backstage) **Get a move on Granger!

Hermione: **(glares at Draco)** and I'll be singing "Hollaback Girl" by Gwen Stefani

Judges: **(nods and music starts to play)**

Hermione: Uh huh, this my shit. All the girls stomp your feet like this. A few times I've been around that track. So it's not just gonna happen like that cause I ain't not hollaback girl. I ain't no hollaback girl. A few times I've been around that track. So it's not just gonna happen like that cause I ain't not hollaback girl. I ain't no hollaback girl. Ooooh, this my shit, this my shit. I heard that you were talking shit and you didn't think that I would hear it. People hear you talking like that, getting everybody fired up. So I'm ready to attack, gonna lead the pack. Gonna give a touch down, gonna take you out. That's right, put your pom-poms down, getting everybody fired up. **(music starts to die)**

Draco:** (wide-eyed)** I never thought she's sing something that cusses!

Me: I agree with Draco. Who knew? But I loved it! Let us hope the other judges think so too! **(turns to Alex and Scott)**

Alex: I would say I have a comment, but I don't think there is any to say. The cussing part doesn't raise your score. **(Glares at Scott who is continually laughing) **And if we might be able to get that through, your singing talent will be a success.

Scott: (Stops Laughing and hits Alex on the back) That is the best performance I have ever seen tonight...no point in bringing out the other contestants...Hermione should win just for singing that!(Glares back at Alex who is now holding a bat) 

Ginny: **(walks on the stage with confidence) **Hello, I'm Ginny Weasley and I'll be singing "Sometimes" by Britney Spears.

Judges: **(Alex and Kiwi nods, Scott screams, and the music starts to play)**

Ginny: You tell me you're in love with me, that you can't take your pretty eyes away from me. It's not that I don't want to stay, but everything you come close, I move away. I wanna believe in everything that you say because it sounds so good. But if you really want me, move it slow. There's things about me you just have to know. Sometimes I run. Sometimes I hide. Sometimes I'm scared of you. But all I really want is to hold you tight, treat you right, be with you day and night. Baby all I need is time. **(music dies)**

Ginny Fans: **(yells and screams)**

Alex: hmm...so I say something first eh? Well I like your voice really I do, but what's with all the love songs? **(sigh)**

Me: You have a lovely voice…but I agree with Alex, what is up with all the lovey-dovey?

Scott: (uncurls from ball position) Is that shit over! That is the WORST song I have EVER heard! And you missed half the notes, making it sound worse! Get the F#$ off the stage, you little slut!

Ginny: **(Runs offstage, crying, as Draco walks on)**

Draco: **(smirks and winks at all the pretty girls out in the audience)**

Draco FanGirls: **(screams and faints)**

Draco: I can not believe you decided to make me go last **(glares at the judges)** Anyway, I'm Draco Malfoy and I will be singing "Bad Boys"

Judges: **(nods and music plays)**

Draco: Bad boys bad boys, whatcha gonna do, whatcha gonna do when they come for you? Bad boys bad boys, whatcha gonna do, whatcha gonna do when they come for you? **(music dies)**

Me: That was interesting…**(blinks)**

Alex: WHO DO YOU THINK THE HECK YOU ARE? SOME KIND OF BAD ASS? GET OFF THE STAGE! NO GET OUT THE BUILDING! **(trying to get up, but Scott's holding me back)**

Me: **(looks at Draco)** No, just go back stage after Scott here judges you.

Scott: **GET THE F$# OF THIS PLANET! I DON'T CARE WHERE YOU GO! THAT WAS EVEN WORSE THAN GINNY'S. YOU ARE MOST POSIBLY THE WORST SINGER EVER...WHY YOU ARE HERE, I DON'T KNOW. JUST LEAVE!** Kiwi...

Me: **(gets onstage)** Hello! Well, that was an amusing first round of the semi-finals wasn't it? Well, let's give around of applause for the contestants. **(room is filled with claps, then after a moment, dies)** Ok, contestants, come onstage so we can decide who will venture to the finals! **(sits back down at the Judge's Table) (contestants walk onto the stage) **Harry potter, please step forward.

Harry: **(nervously steps forward)**

Me: You sung "Boulevard of Broken Dreams" by Green Day. I personally love Green Day, but that doesn't change whatever I say. But, you sung wonderfully, so I say yes…Alex?

Alex: **(shrug) **You sang alright, just keep practicing, okay twinkle toes? I say…yes **(watches as Harry nods)**

Scott: I vote for you to move to the next round...but practice...hot stuff.

Me: Congratulations! You move on to the next round! Please step offstage to your right. **(Fans scream and clap)**

Me: Ron Weasley, step forward

Ron:** (takes a step forward)**

Me: **(lets out a breath)** Where to begin…oh…that was completely horrible. I never thought I…d ever see anything so horrible…I say no. Alex?

Alex: Considering you creeped out the whole audience, I think that would be a no.

Scott: Could be a LOT better...but I think you can do better. Yes.

Me: Sorry Ron, but you failed to impress the majority of the judges, so no, you don't move on. Please step offstage to the left. **(Ron Fans scream and shout and glared and all leave the auditorium) **

Me: Hermione Granger

Hermione: **(steps forward, shaking like a leaf)**

Me: I love your song and you surprised us all by singing it like a pro. I say yes…Alex?

Alex: Except for your cussing your song was okay, but just know that cussing doesn't raise your score. I don't want you to think that if you cuss in every song, that everybody will like it. I say…yes

Scott: B-A-N-A-N-A-S...I say a definite Y-E-S.

Me: Congratulations! You move on to the next round! Please step offstage to your right. **(Fans scream and clap)**

Me: Ginny Weasley

Ginny: **(steps forward bravely, like a true Gryffindor)**

Me: Interesting choice of song. But…you weren't good enough. I feel like you can do a lot better. I say no…Alex?

Alex:Y'know, I don't know what to think. The part of it being a love song is not original. You have a good talent, but you didn't put forth the effort. Try somewhere else. Sorry, but that's a no.

Scott: Sorry...no.

Me: Sorry Ginny, but you failed to impress judges, so no, you don't move on. Please step offstage to the left. **(Ginny Fans scream and shout and glared and all leave the auditorium)**

Me: And last, but no least, Draco Malfoy.

Draco:** (sneers at the 'Anti-Draco' fan club and steps forward)**

Me: **(shakes head, highly disappointed)** You didn't even sing anything. You just repeated yourself twice. I still love you, but no…Alex, what do you think?

Alex: **(turns to 'Anti-Draco' fans)** CAN I JOIN? PLEASE? I would gladly join! THAT'S A NO!

Me: Calm yourself a little Alex. **(smiles weakly at Draco)**

Scott: (starts to fume) **NEVER WILL YOU MOVE ONTO THE NEXT ROUND. GO BACK TO BEING A DEATH EATER, YOU SCUM!** Kiwi...the results? (starts calming down) 

Me: Sorry Draco, but you failed to impress any one of the judges, so no, you don't move on. Please step offstage to the left. **(Ron Fans scream and shout and glared and all leave the auditorium)**

Me: **(gets up on the stage)** Will Harry Potter and Hermione Granger please come and stand on either side of me? **(Harry and Hermione come back onstage and stand next to me.)** Ladies and Gentlemen! These two wonderful singers will be going on the first round of the finals in a couple weeks...er…at least as soon as the next 2 rounds of the semi-finals are over with! Hehehehe. Until our next show, this is Harry Potter Idol over and out!

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**A/N: Hello all of my reviewers, if you are reading this, then you have probably laughed real hard. Alex and Scott are two of my friends. They actually gave me their own responses. Without them, this wouldn't be funny at all, so I give a special BIG THANKS for helping me with this. **

**This is my first humor fic so…I hope you all like it! Hehehehehhe Please review and tell me what you think! Hehehehe Don't worry, there's only mild cussing in this. As you can tell, we're not saying the 'F word' but this story will remain T rated, just in case.**

**Here's on the next Harry Potter Idol:**

**Pansy  
****George  
****Fred  
****Percy  
****Lucius**

**I wonder how funny this will be? Tune in next time for the next chapter…did that make any sense? Whatever**

**Alex says "GET OFF MY STAGE!" (quacks and turns around to get stuffed fish out of boxes and throws them at the audience.)**

**Kiwi**


	2. Round Two of the Semi Finals

**A/N: Hey! I am soooooooooooooo sorrry! It's been a whole month and about one day! (cries) Alex, Scott, I started school on the 22nd and that's been our number one priority at the moment, but never fear! We will keep doing this. So too much fun to stop anyway. But here you are the 2nd chapter! YAY!…I bet you are all thinking '_finally!'_ hehehehehehe sorry again**

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Me: Hello! **(runs toward near the edge of the stage and jumps up and lands on a star)** We've finally got a gold star! **(points excitedly to the floor)** now, I know where to stand when I get up here! **(dances in circles)** YAY! Anyway, welcome back to Harry Potter Idol! It's been awhile because school is literally killing Alex, Scott, and me! **(waves to Alex and Scott, but they don't notice because they seem to be arguing)** It looks like our judges are arguing at the moment. **(they start to beat each other)** No, I lied. They are literally fighting…

Scott: Shut up! DON'T BE JEALOUS BECAUSE I AM GOING FIRST TODAY!

Alex: SCOTT YOU ARE SO ANNOYING! IF I HAD A QUACKING NICKEL FOR EVERY TIME YOU SAY SOMETHING THAT ANNOYING ME, I'D BE QUACKING RICH!

Scott: SHUT UP YOU WANNA-BE DUCKIE! OH AND I STOLE ALL OF YOUR SUGAR COOKIES AND ATE THEM THIS MORNING BACK STAGE! SO HA HA HA!

Alex: **(hits Scott over the head)** YOU STUPID NINCONPOOP! I ALREADY ATE THOSE LAST NIGHT SO NYAH! **(sticks out tongue) **YOU ARE SO DUMB EVEN MONKEYS BEHAVE BETTER THAN YOU!

Scott: SHUT UP! JUST FOR THAT, I AM GOING TO MAKE A PAPER ORIGAMI MONKEY AND PROVE THAT I AM BETTER THAN IT! **(runs to find paper quickly)**

Alex: **(Has all the paper hiding in my backpack under the judges table)** MWAHAHAHAH! **(throws backpack out the window)** NOW WE HAVE NO MORE PAPER FOR THIS NINCOMPOOP!

Me: **(clears throat)** Um…Alex, Scott? We have a show to do…and you keeping it from showing…**(runs offstage and sits down in the middle of the judges' table)** STOP FIGHTING AND SIT DOWN! YOU TWO CAN CONTINUE THIS AFTER TONIGHT'S SHOW! (**smiles sweetly)** Please?

Pansy: **(is a little scared of coming on because Kiwi just had the devil side and angel side came out in the same minute. Is wearing close to nothing and way too much make-up) **H-Hello, I'm Pansy Parkinson and I'll be singing "I'm a Slave 4 U" by Britney Spears.

Judges: **(Kiwi looks like she is about to puke. Scott tried to find sleeping pills, but just sucks on some fruit drops instead. Alex reaches for earplugs from under the table and puts them in her ears and begins humming the time warp**, **and music starts to play)**

Pansy: I know I may me young, but I've got feelings to. And I need to do what I feel like doing. So let me go and just listen. All you people look at me like I'm a little girl. Well, did you ever think it'd be okay for me to step into this world? Always saying, little girl don't step into the club. Well, I'm just trying to find out why cause dancing's what I love. Get it, get it (WHOOOA) Get it, get it (WHOOOOOA)(Do you like it?) Get it, get it (OOOHHH). I know I may come off quiet. I may come off shy. But I feel like talking, feel like dancing when I see this guy. What's practical is logical. What the hell, who cares? All I know is I'm happy when you're dancing there. I'm a slave for you. I cannot hold it; I cannot control it. I'm a slave for you. I won't deny it; I'm not trying to hide it, **(music dies)**

Me: **(is backstage puking)**

Scott: (stares with shock) ...uh...**(cough)**slut**(cough)** It was very...interesting. Aren't you cold in that outfit?(glares back at Alex) 

Alex: BRITNEY SPEARS? WTF! THAT PROSTITUTE? OH HELL NO! **(starts walking over to the stage with a rake in hand, when all of a sudden Scott holds me back)** DAMMIT SCOTT LET ME GO! Fine! **(goes and sits back down grumbling about stupid strip pop singers)**

Me: **(comes back, a little green in the face…then turns red with anger and embarrassment that something like that came onto the stage)** God! That was horrid! Get off my stage you skankie slut!

George: **(walks onstage)** Hi! I'm Fred Wealsey—

Me: Woah! Wait! **(looks down on a piece of paper) **Fred, I have you down after George.

George: **(starts to laugh)** HAHAHAHAHA! I tricked you! I'm really George Weasley.

Me: **(smiles and laughs)** Okie, reintroduce yourself then.

George: **(smiles)** I'm George Weasley and I will be singing "Beverly Hills" by Weezer.

Judges: **(nods and music plays)**

George: Where I come from isn't all that great. My automobile is a piece of crap, my fashion sense is a little whack, and my friends are just as screwy as me. I didn't go to boarding schools. Preppy girls never looked at me. Why should they? I ain't nobody, got nothing in my pocket. Beverly Hills—that's where I want to be! (Gimme Gimme) Living in Beverly Hills…Beverly Hills—rolling like a celebrity! (Gimme Gimme) Living in Beverly Hills.** (music dies) (bows low)**

Fans: WE LOVE YOU GEORGE! MARRY US! **(screams and claps)**

George: **(winks and smiles)**

Scott: (gags under table and reemerges) Wow...uh...just wow. That was alright but I would have picked a song that would show my voice range.(picks up paper and starts folding origami) 

Alex: **(steals origami from Scott and hides it) **YAY! I'VE GOT AN ORIGAMI! WHOOOHOOO! Oh, and George, …uh… whoever you think you are, you were pretty good, now leave me to my origami. **(takes origami out of hiding place)**

Me: **(blinks at Alex and Scott and shakes head)** You were awesome! Your singing could be a little better and you can always practice a bit too **(nods and smiles)**

Fred: **(gives George a high-five as they pass each other)** I am Fred Wealsey, no relation to Ron Weasley. **(audience laughs)**

Ron: **(decided to stay and watch Fred and George) **HEY!

Fred: I kid I kid **(laughs)** I'll be singing "Don't Cha" by Pussycat Dolls

Judges:** (nods and music starts to play)**

Scott: Oh gods!

Fred: Baby. Ladies. Fellas. Are you ready? Let's dance! Baby (ooh). I know you like me (I know you like me). I know you do (I know you do). That's why, whenever I come around, she's all over you (she's all over you). I know you want it (I know you want it). It's easy to see (it's easy to see). And in the back of your mind, I know you should me f---ing me (babe). Don't cha wish your girlfriend was hott like me? Don't cha wish you girlfriend was a freak like me? Don't cha, don't cha. Don't cha wish you girlfriend was raw like me? Don't cha wish your girlfriend was fun like me? Don't cha, don't cha. **(music dies)**

Me: **(leans against Scott, laughing)** That…was…so…funny!

Scott: (slowly moves hand towards Kiwi and then pushes her off quickly) GET OFF ME WENCH! That was very good. I liked it. (Finishes origami) Look...a monkey!

Me: Ow! Hey! Mean! And that's an ugly monkey, by the way!

Alex: WHAT! WHERE? **(looks around the auditorium) **DAMN YOU SCOTT! **(glares at Scott laughing, then looks back at the stage) **Yeah, that was pretty good, just work a little on your singing.

Percy: **(doesn't even look at Fred as he passes)** Hello, I am Percy Wealsey and I will be singing "Right Here" by Staind.

Judges:** (nods and music starts to play)**

Percy: I know I've been mistaken, but just give me a break and se the changes that I've made. I've got some imperfections, but how can you collect them all and throw them in my face? But you always find the words to say to keep me right here waiting. And if you choose to walk away, I'd still be right here waiting, searching for things to say to keep you right here waiting. I hope you're not intending to be so condescending, it's as much as I can take and you're so independent. You just refuse to bend so I keep bending til I break. **(music dies)**

Me: Ooh! I love that song! But that doesn't mean anything. You didn't sing all that well, but I like the choice of song though.

Scott: That was horrible. You are too uptight to even be here. I wish I could vote right now but I can not.

Alex: **(ahem)** that was extremely horrible. Maybe I should just jump on the bandwagon now! **(looks over to Scott holding a jar of peanut butter and a spoon.)** NO YOU CAN'T HAVE ANY! NYAH!

Lucius:** (strides onto the stage and looks around with a glare because the audience and judges are muggles or muggle-born)** I'm Lucius Malfoy and I'll be singing "Baby Got Back" my Sir Mix-A-Lot.

Judges: **(Kiwi glares because she's a muggle-born and music plays) **

Lucius: I like big butts and I cannot lie. You otha brothas can't deny that when a girl walks in with an itty-bitty waist and a round thing in your face, you get sprung. Wanna pull up front cuz you notice that butt was stuffed deep in the jeans she's wearing. I'm hooked and I can't stop staring. Oh baby I wanna get with ya and take your picture. My homeboys tired to warn me, but with that butt you got me horny. Oooh, rub all of that smooth skin. You say you wanna get in my Benz. Well, use me, use me cuz you ain't that average groupy. **(music dies)**

Draco: **(shrinks down in the chair in the audience) **Oh man, how horrible. What was he thinking! **(mutters)**

Me: Oh my God! **(laughing hysterically) **I take back what I said earlier. This is the funniest thing ever! Wait…I didn't say that earlier…oh well…

Scott:** (staring with shock)** What...the...f$#!**(runs up onto the stage and slaps Lucius and takes back seat from paper monkey) **evil paper monkey!(grabs a lighter and burns it) hehe...burn baby, burn!

Me: **(hurriedly puts up an invisible shield in front of the audience and judges…just in case Lucius decides to kill us all)** Idiot! Don't do that! **(glares at Scott)**

Alex: WHERE THE HECK DID DRACO COME FROM? I thought he was supposed to be thrown out! **(grabs a stuffed fish) **STUPID DRACO! **(throws fish at him then looks over to Lucius looking disgusted)** YOU ARE SUCH AN ASS! GET OFF MY STAGE YOU MUGGLE WANNABE! YOU STUNK!

Me:** (gets onstage after Lucius gets off and stands on the gold star)** WOW! What comical acts we had tonight, agreed? **(laughs and glares at Scott and Alex…they are arguing…again)** They really are friends, by the way…that's just showing they care for each other…I think...**(walks slowly offstage and stands in front of the table. They are still arguing)** Hey.** (slaps hands down on the table.)** …I feel like yelling at the moment…HEY! THE DAMN SHOW ISN'T OVER YET! I THOUGHT I TOLD YOU TWO TO WAIT!** (Percy, Pansy, George, Fred, Lucius, Harry, and Hermione emerge from backstage to observe)**

Scott: SHUT UP YOU STUDIP BITCHY DYKE! 

Me: YOU SHUT UP! **(hits you on the arm hard)**

Alex: **(quacks to 711 to get Dr. Pepper for extra hyperness)**

Scott: DUCKIE! GET YOUR ASS BACK HERE!

Alex: NO! 

Me: SHUT UP SCOTT! THIS IS ME AND YOU NOW!

Scott: **(ruffles Kiwi's hair so its poofy and then runs after Alex with a giant rubber banana, then falls down on the ground, not breathing) **Oh…crap…

Alex: **(comes back quacking witch a large Dr. Pepper and Reese's Peanut Butter Cups)**

Me: **(leaves Scott and gets back onstage)** Sorry about that…**(hair is a big puffball)**Well, that was fun…okie, let's see who's going onto the next round, shall we? **(gets offstage and sits down at the judge's table cautiously and looks from Alex to Scott occasionally) **Pansy Parkinson

Pansy: **(walks onto stage…like a whore)**

Me: I have two things to say. PUT SOME DAMN CLOTHES ON! AND THAT WAS FLIPPIN' HORRIBLE!

Scott: NO! JUST NO!

Alex: GET THE F OFF THE STAGE YOU WHORE! GODS THAT'S DISGUSTING! NO GET OUT OF THIS COUNTRY! NOW! GO TO LAS VEGAS TO DRESS LIKE THAT!

Me: Sorry, Pansy, you did not impress any of the insane judges, so I can't let you move on…Please exit stage left. **(mutters)** …Thank God…I don't want someone like her on this show…

Pansy: **(runs of the stage crying and muttering)** I was the best one here!

Me: George Weasley

George: **(walks proudly onstage)**

Scott: It was good. I would like to see more from you...and a little less clothing! (winks) YES!

Alex: **(looks over at Scott shaking head)** SCOTT YOU DUMMY! You were good, so that's a yes!

Me: I loved your singing, could be better though. Work on that a little, and I say yes!

Me: Congrats Fr-I mean George! You move onto the next round! Please step off the stage to your right.

Me: Fred Weasley

Fred: **(walks onstage with a goofy grin)**

Me: That was very funny. I think comedy is good, other than that, you sung great too! I say yes, Scott?

Scott: **(says with a big smile)**...NO...just kidding...I say YES 

Alex: no, wait yes, wait no, wait yes, wait no…fine! YES! GODS YOU ARE TOO ANNOYING…**(glares at nothing in particular)**

Me: Congratulations Fred! You move onto the next round. Please move to your right.

Me: Percy Weasley

Percy: **(walks onstage like a stiff businessman)**

Me: I like the song, but that doesn't mean anything. Basically, you sucked. I don't even know why you came here. I say no, Scott?

Scott: NO! YOU ARE PATHETIC. YOU ACT LIKE YOU HAVE A STICK UP YOUR ASS!

Alex: YOU ARE AN EMBARASSMENT TO ALL DONKEY"S ALIKE! NO! DEFINITELY NO!

Me: Sorry Percy, you failed. Please exit stage left…now!

Me: Lucius Malfoy

Lucius: **(walks onstage, glaring at everyone)**

Scott: Sorry, but my meds ran out...oh oops, wrong show...I think my paper monkey was better than you. No.

Alex: YOU ARE AT THE WRONG PLACE! GO BACK TO YOUR DAYS RING AROUND THE ROSEY DAYS YOU BUTTHOLE! MY ANSWERS A HELL NO!

Me: Hell nah! I will not have a blood purity freak on this show! Get off my damn stage before I decide to do something horrible!

Me: NO YOU DON'T GO ON! GET OFF STAGE LEFT NOW!

Me:** (gets onstage and stands proudly on my gold star**.) Fred and George Weasley, get over here and stand next to me.** (Fred and George come out and stands on either side of me) **Congratulations you two! Ladies and Gentlemen, these two wonderful singers are moving onto the first round of the finals in about a week and a half or so! Please give a round of applause **(auditorium is filled with claps, screams, whistles, etc.)** Until that time, this is Harry Potter Idol, over and out! **(gets offstage)**

Alex: **(chases after Scott with a rake in hand, running around the stage giggling evilly) **OH SCOTT! **(says in a sing-song voice)**

Me: **(sighs and follows them so they don't kill each other)**

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**A/N: WOW! What a violent 2nd chapter huh? Lots of yelling. I wonder what will happen in the next chapter o.0 oh no! Voldemort is here! Who invited him! Well, this will be interesting….o.0**

**Characters that will perform in the 3rd chapter:**

**Snape  
****Lupin  
****McGonagall  
****Dumbledore  
****Voldemort**

**Well, I just like to thank my reviewers, so here goes:**

**_Star-n-moon91_- Don't worry. I was actually thinking about this story before I read the 6th book, so Dumbledore will be here. Hehehehehe**

**_Ghostwriter626-_ Glad I can make you laugh. Hehehehehehehe**

**Zarroc- yeah, Alex thought up Draco's song, I thought Ron's because I think he had this big ego or something. Hahahhahahaha**

**_Cammie Jensen_- no, I didn't know about Pop Idol, sorry. I'm an American through and through. Like I said to Zarroc, Draco's song was Alex's idea. Hehehahah**

**_Joe M Amma_- yeah, very funny Scott. AHHAHAHHAHHAHHAHAHAHHAHA**

**_LittleMissWerewolf_- Yay! I updated and already started on chapter three! Hehehehe**

**_Noxon1_- I am happy you like it. Thanks**

**_Servicelight_- yes, I love Alex and Scott. Without them, this story would be nothing. Same with the random fans. Hahahahhahehehehehe**

**_Harry Potter Ninja_- Yeah, sorry for the wait, we had started school a couple days after I had started this chapter…schools a bum….-.-;;**


	3. Round Three of the Semi Finals

**A/N: Yes, I am soooooo sorry guys...well…actually this isn't my fault! I can't believe the nerve! I do hope I still have readers left to read this… I don't think I would be able to go on if no one reviews! I don't want that because I love this story…so…how about we have me shut up so you can read the chapter huh? Sounds great. (smiles like an anime character)**

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Me: **(gets onstage and stand on the gold star)** Well, we had an interesting round last time didn't we? **(laughs)** Let's hope that doesn't happen this time…Guess what? This is the last round of the semi-finals! Next round is the 1st round of the Finals! YAY! Well, I forgot to say 'Welcome back to Harry Potter Idol!' so, Welcome back to another round of Harry Potter Idol! **(giggles)** So, let's get it started! **(jumps offstage and sits down in between Alex and Scott)**

Snape:** (strides onto the stage, robe billowing out behind him)** Severus Snape and I'll be singing "Baby One More Time" by Britney Spears.

Me: **(whispers to Alex and Scott)** What is up with all the Britney Spears songs?** (shuts up as the music starts to play)**

Snape: Oh baby, baby. How was I supposed to know that something wasn't right here? Oh baby, baby. I shouldn't have to let you go and now you're out of sight, yeah. Show me how you want to be. Tell me baby 'cause I need to know now, oh because. My loneliness is killing me. I must confess I still believe when I'm not with you. I lose my mind. Give me a sign. Hit me baby one more time. Oh baby, baby. The reason I breathe is you, boy you got me blinded. Oh pretty baby, there's nothing that I wouldn't do. It's not the way I planned it. Show me how you want it to be. Tell me baby 'cause I need to know now, oh because. **(music fades away slowly)**

Me: **(can't breathe because of laughter and then takes a forced deep breath)** Just get…off…my stage…you freak!

Alex: **(falls on the floor rolling with laughter and quacks)** that** (quack) **was so** (quack quack)** FUNNY! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHA! But...awe heck! A guy singing that song must be crazy in the head! HAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHH!

Scott: grabs throwing stars and starts to hurl them at Snape) HA HA HA! Hey Hooked Nose, dodge these! Get of Kiwi's stage!

Lupin: **(walks onstage as a human since it's in the middle of the afternoon)** Hello, I'm Remus Lupin and I'll be singing "Scars" by Papa Roach.

Judges: **(nods and music starts to play)**

Lupin: I tear my heart open, I sew myself shut. My weakness is that I care too much and my scars remind me that the past is real. I tear my heart open just to fail. Drunk and I'm feeling down and I just wanna be alone. I'm pissed cause you came around. Why don't you just go home? Cause you channel all your pain and I can't help you fix yourself. You're making me insane. All I can say is: I tear my heart open, I saw myself shut. My weakness is that I care too much and my scars remind me that the past is real. I tear my heart open just to fail. **(music dies)**

Me: **(nods head)** I didn't think you sung al too well. You could have been better.

Alex: Neh...**(throws a tomato at Scott) (looks up)** oh, huh? **(looks up at the person on the stage)** I'm sorry, did you already sing? I thought someone was killing a poor cat.

Scott: finds some pineapple and pink stuff) What? Oh I'm not going to throw THIS at Kiwi and Alex...yet! It was good, wolf boy. But you need to have a cough drop for that throat.(Throws cough drop at Lupin) SUCK IT!

McGonagall: **(walks briskly onstage, hair is pulled back into a tight bun, as always)** Hello, I'm Minerva McGonagall and I'll be singing "Why Can't I" by Liz Phair.

Judges: **(nods and music starts to play)**

McGonagall: Get a load of me, get a load of you. Walkin' down the street and I hardly know you. It's just like we were meant to be. Holding hands with you when we're out at night. Got a girlfriend, you say it isn't right and I've got someone waiting too. What if this is just the beginning? We're already wet, and we're gonna go swimming. Why can't I breathe whenever I think about you? Why can't I speak whenever I talk about you? It's inevitable, it's a fact that we're gonna get down to it. So tell me. Why can't I breathe whenever I think about you? **(music dies)**

Alex: Why do I have to talk first? **(looks at Kiwi-san giggling, then at Scott)** And YOU TWO! STOP LAUGHING! GRRRR! **(looks at McGonagall)** uh yeah, you were good, but I think you need a little bit of a wardrobe change, but besides that, you're pretty good. **(smiles while crossing fingers behind back)**

Me: I agree with Alex. You did sing very well.

Scott: Eh. Old saggy tits, that sucked. I think my dead mother can sing better than you...well she isn't dead...just looks dead.** (throws pineapples at Kiwi and pink stuff at Alex)** I have no idea what this pink stuff is!

Dumbledore: **(walks onstage, eyes twinkling) **Hello Miss Kiwi, Miss Alex, and Mr. Scott, I'm Albus Dumbledore and I'll be singing "Since You've Been Gone" by Kelly Clarkson.

Judges: **(nods and music plays)**

Dumbledore: Here's the thing, we started out friends. It was cool, but it was all pretend. Yeah, yeah, since you've been gone. Your dedicated, you took the time, wasn't long till I called you mine. Yeah, yeah, since you've been gone. And all you ever hear me say is how I picture me with you. That's all you ever hear me say. But since you've been gone, I can breathe for the first time. I'm so moving on. Yeah, yeah. Thanks to you, now I get what I want. Since you've been gone. **(music dies)**

Me:** (nods)** Very good. You sung very well. **(smiles at the Headmaster)** I bet you will go on. **(nods again)**

Alex: Don't call me "miss Alex" makes me feel old, and ...well I probably shouldn't go on...**(looks at Scott snickering) **You know, I'm sure Scott would like to say some lovely things about your singing that I could never put into words.

Scott: **(glaring daggers at Alex) ** Why are you not dead? Well I liked it. It was angelic. NEXT! We have MOLDY VOLDY! a.k.a. Voldemort/He-who-Must-Not-Be-Named/You-Know-Who!

Me: **(grabs a walky-talky)** Don't let Voldemort come onstage yet…we need to get something-someone rather…**(let's go of the button)**

Some guy from backstage: Alrighty Kiwi 

Me: Thanks Shawn **(puts down walky-talky down and whispers to Alex Scott)** Hey…let's get Harry out here before Voldemort comes onstage. You know how he feels about muggle-borns and muggles. **(gets onstage)** Hi, before we let our final contestant onstage, we need to go find someone…so just talk amongst yourselves, go to the bathroom, or whatever and we'll be right back **(gets offstage (and goes through a door labeled "Backstage")** Um…excuse me, Liz, where's Harry Potter?

Liz: Why do you need him?

Me: You-Know-Who is on next…who invited him and why. I have no clue, but we need Harry to protect us…in case one of us **(shots a glare at Scott)** does or says something stupid and upset him.

Liz: Oh! I believe he's the boys' dressing room…but that was an hour ago…he might not be in there anymore…

Me: Okie, thanks **(runs off to the boys dressing room, then stops at the door)** Alex and I can't go in there and Scott might molest them al or something…**(laughs and knocks on the door)**

Fred and George: COME IN! 

Me: **(opens the door and walks in)** Is Harry here?

Fred: **(shakes head)** No, he left ten minutes ago.

Me: Damn…do you know where he went?

George: To go get food.

Me: Okie, thanks **(runs out of the dressing room)** TO THE LOBBY! **(points heroically to the ceiling and runs to the lobby)**

Harry: **(munching happily on nachos)**

Me: **(grabs Harry away from his nachos and runs back onto the stage, forgetting about Alex and Scott)**

Harry: **(lost and confused)**

Me: Okie, we're **(looks around) **Well, I'm back with the person I've been searching for…Harry Potter! **(claps)**

Harry: **(still a little confused)**

Me: Our next contestant is You-Know-Who, and we-Alex, Scott, and me- are a little opened-minded…them more than I am. **(smiles weakly)** So, Harry and the rest of the wizards and witches in here we need to put up a protective shield. Many of them. **(shouts of the protective charm is heard and a lot of shields are put up around the judges and audience) **Harry, you get to stay with us at the table. **(gets offstage and sits down at the judges table)**

Harry: **(conjures a seat at the end of the table)**

Me: **(picks up the walky-talky)** Okie Shawn, you can let him onstage now.

Shawn: Alrighty-o Kiwi

Voldemort: **(glides onto the stage, looking disgusted and glaring at everyone and opens arms out wide like a big hug)** I am Lord Voldemort, greatest Dark wizard ever! **(laughs evilly)** I will be singing "Headstrong" by Trapt.

Harry: **(glares daggers)**

Judges: **(nods and music plays)**

Voldemort: Circling your head, contemplating everything you ever said. Now I see the truth, I got doubt, a different motive in your eyes and now I'm out. See you later. I see your fantasy, you want to make it a reality paved in gold. See inside, inside of our heads (yeah). Well, now that's over. I see your motives inside, decisions to hide. Back off, we'll take you on **(a bunch of death-eaters pop out of nowhere and start to dance)** Headstrong to take on anyone. I know that you are wrong. Headstrong, we're headstrong. Back off we'll take you on. Headstrong to take on anyone. I know that you are wrong and this is not where you belong. I can't give everything away. I won't give everything away. **(music fades and death-eaters disappear)**

Me: You…hmm…how to put this so he doesn't get very mad…um…you didn't sing very well…**(is scared half to death)**

Alex: WTF? That was so pathetic, I think you need to be picked up by the medical police to take you to the insane asylum! YOU NEED TO GET YOUR THOUGHTS STRAIGHT! **(Glares at Scott laughing) **Yeah, and I just don't like you.

Me: I am so thankful I got protections wards from all the wizards and witches in here….**(mutters lays head on the table)**

Scott: NO MOLDY VOLDY! DON'T LEAVE ME WITH THESE MUDBLOODS! **(runs backstage to see Voldemort then runs back out with a piece of bread in his nose) ** I still like him.

Me: **(gets onstage after Voldemort left and the spells were off) **That was kind of scary…wasn't it? What an eventful final round of the semi-finals. I have to say, I really enjoyed it. **(smiles) **oh! I got these star candies. They're soft and supposedly sour, but they're not, they are soooooo yummy! **(throws bags to the audience and Alex and Scott) **So, lets chose who get to go onto the finals with Harry, Hermione, Fred, and George, shall we?** (sits back down at the judges table)** Snape.

Snape: **(walks onstage, robes billowing…again)**

Me: no…just no… 

Alex: HELL NO! WHERE"S YOUR MAMA BOY? CAUSE OBVIOUSLY SHE NEEDS TO TEACH YOU A LESSON! **(tears open bag of apples and Carmel and begins eating them.)**

Scott: HEY HOOK NOSE! YOU CAN'T SING IF I KICKED YOU IN YOUR BALLS! HA HA HA! NO!

Me: Sorry….no you don't go on….go away…get off my stage you weirdo…GO TO THE LEFT OF THE STAGE NOW!

Me: Lupin

Lupin **(walks onstage calmly)**

Alex: hmmm...let me think about it...**(pretends to think and two seconds later)** I didn't hear you sing, so I'll just go along with Kiwi-san and Scott. **(throws the empty bag of apples and Carmel at Scott)**

Me: I didn't like it too much, sorry, I say no

Scott: Oh Look...A MOON! HA HA MADE YOU LOOK! Don't look at me like you want to eat me! If I say yes will you be happy? YES!(whacks Alex with a rubber banana) 

Me: yes, you move on! Contrats! Please, if you be so kind as to exit stage on the right.

Me: McGonagall

McGonagall: **(walks onstage like the strict teacher she is)**

Me: I like the song, but you didn't sing very well…so I am sorry, but no.

Alex: Good song **(nods)** but you're just too old...**(snickers)** besides that outfit is just...nevermind, just no.

Scott: Hey you old prude, you suck. Your voice sounds like a bag of...CATS! GET OFF THE STAGE YOU OLD WIND BAG!

Me: Sorry, you don't go on, please exit stage left.

Me: Dumbledore

Dumbledore: **(walks onstage, eyes twinkling with amusement)**

Me: **(claps)** Your performance was splendid! A total yes!

Alex: I liked your performance also, but I didn't like being called a "miss". NEVER CALL ME A MISS! GOT IT? **(sighs)** so yes, now, to Scott?

Scott: Shouldn't you be dead? Oh oops...this is before you die...oh you didn't know you are going to die? Well as a goodbye present I'm going to say HELL NO! HA HA! Just kidding...YES!

Me: CONTRATS! You get to move onto the next level! I am soooooo happy! Please exit stage right.

Me: Voldemort **(scared again and spells go back up)**

Voldemort: **(struts onstage)**

Me: One word…no two words: Hell no!

Alex: Many words NOT IN THE NINE CANDY STORES ARE YOU GONNA GET A YES ON THAT SO THAT"S A HELL F(#)$#)$)# NO!

Scott: YAY! MY IDOL! But you SUCK at singing! Sorry Moldy Voldy, but no!

Me: HELL-O NO! GET OFF THE STAGE LEFT! **(shuts up and cowers in fear)**

Me: **(gets onstage after Voldemort gets off.)** K, Lupin and Dumbledore, Please come back onstage. **(they get back onstage)** Everyone, give a round of applause to Remus Lupin and Albus Dumbledore! They're going onto the Finals! The first round of the finals should be coming soon. See you all next time! **(gets offstage tiredly)**

Alex: **(Chases after Scott with a balloon hammer from the fair)** HEY SCOTT! DON'T RUN THIS IS WERE I HIT YOU! **(laughs like a maniac) (then bows to the audience)** THAT'S THE SHOW FOLKS! DRIVE SAFELY AND SEE YA NEXT TIME!

Scott: **(runs backstage to get chocolate pies)** Take this Alex! **(throws pies at Alex and she runs away)** Ha Ha Ha! STOP READING ! What you don't want to? Fine then I will go into an explanation of how babies are made. Oh no...don't leave...I haven't even started yet. No you don't have to leave...Well if you must...HA HA HA! **(runs backstage and curtain closes)**

Me: **(mutters)** how can they have so much energy left?…**(drags feet and leaves)**

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**A/N: I am a little sad…only a few people reviewed the second chapter…but I guess that's my fault for not getting it up sooner…but its not really my fault entirely… Well, as I said, school was killing us, and sadly, it comes first before this…so yeah…but I will try to get the next chapters up faster than I have been…although I can't really say that because I have two other writers on this fic…**

**Okie, since I didn't get as much reviews as I would have liked, I am not going to update until I get at least five reviews. Sorry, but I don't really like to post up stories that aren't getting reviews…so yeah, at least five…I know you all can do it!**

**Stay tuned for the next round of Harry Potter Idol, Round one of the finals! Here's who performing:**

**Harry  
****Fred**

**Yes, only two per chapter now, so now they will be singing the whole song that I choose for them. So yeah…I hope you all review! **

**A special thanks for those of you who did review:**

**Zarroc: Yes, it was very entertaining for me to write it, then reread it. The song I gave him fits well doesn't it? **

**Inuyasha'sGirl1: YAY! Yummy cookies rule! Hehhehehe here you go, the third chapter **


	4. Round One of the Finals

**A/N: Let's just get into the chapter shall we? i bet you are all excited hehehehehehehe**

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Me: **(gets onstage with a lot of excitement)** Can you all believe it's finally the finals? As a special treat to my audience (readers/reviewers), you guys get to pick who gets to go on to the next round! Let's reintroduce our judges for the finals, k? Well, I'm Kiwi-san, but you can just call me Kiwi if you wish. With me on the judges panel is Scott and Alex! **(claps along with the audience) **They are the funniest people ever! **(nods, thinking about anything else to say) **Oh! The finals are going to go by a lot quicker because there's only going to be two contestants each round. They will be singing the whole song of their choice. How about we have a playback of today's contestants. **(moves as a giant screen comes down)**

_Harry:…I walk this empty street, on the Boulevard of Broken Dreams. Where the city sleeps and I'm the only one and I walk alone. I walk alone. I walk alone. I walk alone. I walk alone…_

_Me: You sung "Boulevard of Broken Dreams" by Green Day. I personally love Green Day, but that doesn't change whatever I say. But, you sung wonderfully, so I say yes…Alex?_

_Alex: **(shrug) **You sang all right, just keep practicing, okay twinkle toes? I say…yes **(watches as Harry nods)**_

_Scott: I vote for you to move to the next round...but practice...hott stuff._

Screen: **(blacks out for a moment)**

_Fred: Don't cha wish your girlfriend was hott like me? Don't cha wish you girlfriend was a freak like me? Don't cha, don't cha. Don't cha wish you girlfriend was raw like me? Don't cha wish your girlfriend was fun like me? Don't cha, don't cha._

_Me: **(leans against Scott, laughing)** That…was…so…funny! _

_Scott: __**(slowly moves hand towards Kiwi and then pushes her off quickly)**_ _ GET OFF ME WENCH! That was very good. I liked it. __**(Finishes origami)** _ _Look...a monkey!_

_Me: Ow! Hey! Mean! And that's an ugly monkey, by the way!_

_Alex: WHAT! WHERE? **(looks around the auditorium) **DAMN YOU SCOTT! **(glares at Scott laughing, then looks back at the stage) **Yeah, that was pretty good, just work a little on your singing._

Me: Let us welcome back Harry Potter! **(screams and fangirls once again fill the room)**

Harry: **(walks onstage with less nervousness and more bravery)** Hello everyone! I'll be singing "READY STEADY GO" by L'ArcenCiel. It's the 2nd opening to FullMetal Alchemist.

Judges: **(nods and music plays)**

Harry: READY STEADY CAN'T HOLD ME BACK  
READY STEADY GIVE ME GOOD LUCK  
READY STREADY NEVER LOOK BACK  
LET'S GET STARTED READY STEADY GO

Scenarios being blown away seem to whirl in front of me  
Even if I get desperate, I won't overlook my target anymore

An unreliable map should be burnt  
I'll grasp onto the buried truth with my hands

I came running frantically -hastily-  
The throb of my heartbeats feels deafening enough to burst  
Your voice is echoing -shouting-  
There's no time to be like standing still here  
READY STEADY GO

Even if my countless wounds get hugged  
For a moment and gently, I won't let my soul get taken  
On the other side of that hill, if I met you  
I'd only think about what to start talking from

I came running frantically -hastily-  
The throb of my heartbeats feels deafening enough to burst  
Your voice is echoing -shouting-  
There's no time to be like standing still here  
READY STEADY GO

READY STEADY CAN'T HOLD ME BACK  
READY STEADY GIVE ME GOOD LUCK  
READY STREADY NEVER LOOK BACK  
LET'S GET STARTED READY STEADY GO

My heart -runs- underneath that sky  
I can't stop my idle feelings from crying out  
Surely I'll -reach- you in a little while  
The sunlight shines hotly across this path  
READY STEADY GO  
PLEASE. TRUST ME.  
**(music dies)**

Me: **(claps)** Yes! That was wonderful! Lovely! Just beautiful!

Scott: Excellent...Just excellent.** (stares around at audience)** What...you expect more from me? I like Harry Pothead...Potter!

Alex: **(opening a package of Reese's Peanut Butter cups and eats one)** yumm... Hmmm?** (looks up)** oh, I thought I heard someone singing. Hmm...not bad.. NO! SCOTT! YOU CAN"T HAVE ONE! **(is running around the auditorium with Scott trying to steal my Reese's)** FINE! **(gives Scott a Reese's and goes to plop back down into my chair)** HMPF! **(mutters)** Always trying to steal my Reese's. **(looks back up at Harry) **Yeah, you were good.

Fred: **(walks onstage) **Hello my lovely fans! I'll be singing "Change the World" by V6. It's the first opening theme song of InuYasha.

Judges:** (nods and music plays)**

Fred: I want to change the world  
Piercing through the gales, unafraid of anything,  
Now I hold my courage and pieces of my smile  
Change my mind  
If we reach out to the soaring future  
without losing our passion, we'll be able to shine,  
It's wonderland

You've left something in the far reaches of the gray sky,  
and you keep on searching  
as you wander.  
In the night when your heart shook, and I can't see tomorrow  
I can't believe anything, and close my ears.  
When I met you, I found my true place in life.  
An innocent kindness is right here.  
And so we awaken...

I want to change the world  
I won't hesitate again. If I can shape a future with you,  
then I can fly anywhere.  
Change my mind  
I can spread my wings and fly towards the unknown future  
without losing my passion.  
It's wonderland

We keep swimming the same world  
until the day we reach our dreams.  
All of us bear the same worries  
When you stop and look, I'll be right here  
gazing at you.

I want to change the world  
If you accept my gaze as I watch over you  
and don't let go of my hand, I can do anything.  
Change my mind  
I won't let you be alone. Everyone is here.  
Let's pierce our way through whatever may happen.  
It's wonderland

I want to change the world  
Piercing through the gales, unafraid of anything,  
Now I hold my courage and pieces of my smile  
Change my mind  
If we reach out to the soaring future  
without losing our passion, we'll be able to shine.  
It's wonderland  
**(music dies)**

Me: Oh, I loved it! Wonderful!

Scott: **(slaps kiwi)** This is too short! You should have put three in one chapter for the finals...but noooo! You are too lazy. Very good Fred. Alex?

Me: HEY! I don't care! I'd rather have the story itself longer!

Alex: **(had hands over ears)** huh? **(looks up as I see that Scott and Kiwi both staring at me)** DID HE FINALLY FINISH THAT HORRIBLE SONG? **(sighs)** thank gods! **(looks at both Kiwi and Scott still staring at me)** WHAT? I don't like that song. I've already heard it. Bleh! . **(shudders at the memories)** OKAY! STOP LOOKING AT ME AND GO ON WITH THE SHOW! GEEZ!

Me: **(gets onstage and stands like Sailor Moon, like a super-hero and points to the audience readers/reviewers)** This is where you guys come in! You get to choose out of who you think should go on to the next round! Please tell us when you review whom you want to go on and the winner will be announced in the next chapter. I want at least five reviews or the suspense will kill you, so get reviewing you guys! Please and thanks!

Alex: **(chases after Scott with a broom)** GET BACK HERE SCOTT! YOU"RE BUYING ME A NEW PACKAGE OF REESE'S! KIWI! STOP HIM!** (Turns to audience)** AND YOU TOO! I WANT REESE'S! OR REVIEWS! EITHER WORKS FOR ME! BUT SCOTT STILL OWES ME REESE'S! **(Chases Scott onto the stage)**

Me: **(looks at the audience)** No way in hell that I'm getting into that argument. **(sighs) **I love those too. **(sighs again and follows them out through the backstage)**

Lights: **(dim)**

**

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**

**A/N: Hello all again. I'm a little disappointed, only two people reviewed again last chapter. I know, I know I said I wasn't going to update until five, but I hate having my story not updated for over a month. I'm trying to get my judges to get me the chapters faster, but Alex is in ALL AP and Honors classes…I have no clue what Scott is doing. I had to bribe him this time….**

**Well, a BIG SPECIAL thanks to those who did review:**

**Idril831: Hehehe, glad I can make you laugh. Thanks for reviewing!**

**Ghostwriter626: yeah, Scott came up with Moldy Voldy. I think its funny too hehehhehee**


	5. Round Two of the Finals

**A/N: I am officially sad. Less than five people reviewed…but since I hate having one of my stories not updated within a month, I'm here…updating this pathetic excuse for a fanfic. Oh! Finals are over and winter break is here! So get ready for a fun time! So here you go.**

**P.S. Sorry for the wait. School started again and i had to put my fics aside for a little. and we all thought this chapter was short, so we fixed it up some...we didn't really get it much longer...**

**

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**

Scott: Before this contest goes on I am going to do something. I am going to fall asleep and whichever contestant can wake me up should win! **(falls asleep)**

Me: **(gets onstage with an envelope in hand and glares at Scott)** Welcome back to another round of Harry Potter Idol! YAY! Here in my hand is the winner of the last round. I bet we're excited right? So let's see who the winner is! **(opens envelop, smiling.)** And the one who gets to move on is…**(pauses for dramatic effect and goes a little too far…five minutes later) **HARRY POTTER!

Harry: **(walks onstage, smiling)** Thanks for everyone who voted! You're so much nicer than the people that I went to school with!

Me: Congrats congrats! Now get off the stage so we can start the round for someone you can compete with

Harry: **(gets offstage)**

Me: Okie, lets get a look at what happened to our next two contestants in their last performance shall we? **(moves as a giant screen comes down like last time)**

Screen: **(is black for a few moments) **

_Lupin: I tear my heart open, I sew myself shut. My weakness is that I care too much and my scars remind me that the past is real. I tear my heart open just to fail._

_Me: **(nods head)** I didn't think you sung all too well. You could have been better._

_Alex: Neh...**(throws a tomato at Scott) (looks up)** oh, huh? **(looks up at the person on the stage)** I'm sorry, did you already sing? I thought someone was killing a poor cat._

_Scott: **(finds some pineapple and pink stuff)** What? Oh I'm not going to throw THIS at Kiwi and Alex...yet! It was good, wolf boy. But you need to have a cough drop for that throat. **(Throws cough drop at Lupin)** SUCK IT!_

Screen: **(blacks out for a moment again)**

_Hermione: Uh huh, this my shit. All the girls stomp your feet like this. A few times I've been around that track. So it's not just gonna happen like that cause I ain't no hollaback girl._

_Me: I agree with Draco. Who knew? But I loved it! Let us hope the other judges think so too! **(turns to Alex and Scott)**_

_Alex: I would say I have a comment, but I don't think there is any to say. The cussing part doesn't raise your score. **(Glares at Scott who is continually laughing) **And if we might be able to get that through, your singing talent will be a success._

_Scott: **(Stops Laughing and hits Alex on the back)** That is the best performance I have ever seen tonight...no point in bringing out the other contestants...Hermione should win just for singing that! **(Glares back at Alex who is now holding a bat)**_

Screen: **(blacks out once again and slowly goes back up)**

Me: So! Let us re-welcome, Remus Lupin! **(claps and gets offstage so Lupin can have the stage.)**

Lupin: Hello there, I'll be singing "True Light", the English opening theme song to D.N.Angel, by Miyamoto Shunichi.

Judges: **(nods and music plays)**

Lupin:

A sad light shone  
Turning into wings that cut the white darkness

Shone upon by the cold sun  
I had some limited freedom  
The miraculous night cast by the mirror  
Started to remove my mask, my soul

On the other side of the collapsing wall  
Despair and hope looks the same  
If there's a heart that's yet to be seen  
Let's head to the end of the prologue

In a world where the wind blows like a blade  
What is it I should protect?  
In a journey where I know one painful thing after another  
I get closer to the true me

The fake light is disappearing  
The true light is born  
In these hands…

Pierce through the night dyed in white  
Keep on creating a new era  
Create time with your heart  
Fly through the eternal white night  
**(music dies)**

Me: YAY! I love that song! So beautiful. But better in Japanese of course, but wonderful!

Alex: What is wrong with that poor cat...Oops...that's your voice, sorry. **(Turns to Scott who has his phone in his hands, and cat sounds are coming from it.)** SCOTT! What did I tell you about playing with your cell phone during one of the contestants singing! No wonder I thought Lupin's voice was the sound of a cat getting killed! **(sighs)** I'll just go with what Kiwi-san says.

Scott: **(sleeping, stops snoring)** Eh? No mommy I don't wanna ride the pony! **(stirs in seat)**

Me: **(glares at Scott again and gets onstage real quick)** Okie! Let us re-welcome Hermione Granger! **(claps and gets offstage again)**

Hermione: Hi all! Glad to be back! I'm singing "Ring", the movie ending theme of Escaflowne, by Hitomi

Judges: **(Alex and Kiwi nods, Scott falls out of chair, still sleeping, and music plays)  
**

Hermione:  
As my tears keep overflowing one after another,  
I can't see your last smile through the blur.  
Please don't go, please don't go…Stay here.  
Light bursts through the sky.

"When you took off I was  
Watching for a long time as the vapor trail disappeared."

Please don't forget  
You're not alone.  
Even if we're apart, we'll still carry on hand-in-hand.

With my first love, I first realized  
That there could be such sorrow.

Even something lapses away, something will  
Live once again.  
When you gave me a smile when we parted, it was  
Your message for me  
To truly live with all my heart

I just know that we'll see each other someday.  
If we're together,  
Even if we're far apart, we can gaze into each other's eyes  
Let's bet everything on our hopes and dreams.

Let's promise each other  
That we'll hold onto the intensity we felt  
That day,  
And live the future that blooms  
In tomorrow.  
**(music dies)**

Me: **(cries)(sniffs)** I love this song! So beautiful! I might use it on one of my fanfics where you fall in love with Draco! **(looks up to meet fire in Hermione's eyes as well as shock)(massive sweatdrop)** Did I say that out loud? I was kidding. Anyway, you sung beautifully. If I were voting, I would say yes! But sadly, I'm not

Alex: Neh. Hey Scott, **(hits Scott on the shoulder)** get a load of this, Kiwi wants the reader's job! HAHAHAHAHA! That's funny. She wants their job, but she's the one who runs the show! **(shrugs to get off weird vibe of laughing)** Anyway, **(turns to Hermione who is slightly laughing at the joke I made)** it seems you not only have quite a talent with the voice, but you have a great sense humor. In my opinion, you win **(points thumb up and winks, then lays back in chair with legs crossed on the table relaxing)**

Me: **(sticks tongue out at Alex)**

Scott: **(wakes up from nap and climbs back into chair)** Wow...you woke me up Ms. Granger...or should I say soon to be Mrs. Malfoy! HA HA HA! **(Hermione  
glares)** I blame Kiwi for it all. You were very good. I hope you are one of the finalists! **(yawns and runs to get some Mountain Dew: Live Wire)**

Me: **(gets onstage and calls out Lupin, then stands in the middle of the two)** Two wonderful performances by two wonderful people. Now! Who is it that's going to go on? That's up to you, my wonderful, loyal reviewers! So! Get to reviewing and tell me who you like better, Remus Lupin, or Hermione Granger?

Kiwi: **(turns to look at the judges table and finds Scott and Alex both missing) **erm…it seems our Judges have run off…

Scott and Alex: **(jump up from behind Kiwi and starts fluffing up her hair)**

Kiwi: HEY! BITCHES! GET OFF! **(slaps hands repeatedly) **

Alex: **(turns to Scott)** Hey! Hey! Scott! The readers are still reading this, lets take a bow!

Scott: YAY! **(grabs Alex and runs up to the stage)**

Scott and Alex: **(bows)**

Alex: What? You guys want more to read? You gotta keep reviewing for our friend Kiwi-san here to get that. **(does a bad imitation of an evil laugh)**

Kiwi: She's right you know…**(smiles while trying to get hair to lie flat without success) **MONSTER BIRD-KICK OF RAGE! **(does a horrible imitation of Misao from Rurouni Kenshin at Scott.)**

Scott: **(rolls eyes)** YES! REVIEW AND YOU CAN READ MORE! YAY! Call... ambul...**(faints) **

* * *

**A/N: So? How was it? I hoped you loved it! And it came quicker than the last chapter right? okay...no it didn't...I can't believe its almost done. Lol. I have the funniest idea for the ending where everyone comes out and sings together. Or with another person. So great. but I'm not telling what it is. I'm not evening telling the other judges hahahhahahahhahahaa**

**I know its short…i'm sorry for that…but the last chapter will make up for the shortness of the 4th, 5th, and 6th chapters. I promise. It'll be great**

**So, let's thank the wonderful reviewers shall we?**

**Zarrco: Thanks for reviewing and staying with me. I'm grateful your loyal to my stories. It makes me really happy. Thanks for always reading and reviewing **

**Mrs.Ginny Weasley-Potter: Thanks for reviewing. Much thanks to you too! hehehehe**


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